I am here to live - that’s it and moment to moment not mater how crap it is also spectacular, it’s life - it’s all valid and momentous.

I literally have no guarantee in anything! Nothing!

But I’ve spent my whole life trying to find it and I can’t! So whilst I indulge in what can be guaranteed i.e. repeats of motherland and Gavin and Stacey. I also face the discomfort of getting on with the rest of life with no promise.

This has been the biggest hurdle of the ADHD journey but I am willing to face every panic attack going to show myself that I am absolutely safe being who I am with what I have right now.

I know I will back track and regress, I know I will fall on my knees and howl to the moon praying for better days, I know I will dysregulate and make mistakes.

But I’m no longer willing to find a solution to avoid all of this , I’d rather get to the root of what’s causing it and go from there, than spend anymore time in avoidance of real feelings and pain.

And guess what it feels frightening but also bloody Great!

I love my job and family and I can’t wait to get back to work tomorrow xxx

Oh and I’d definitely recommend watching this it’s bloody ace!

Em x