A Reflection on Easter Break

and Mental Health

These last two weeks of Easter end of term has been probably one of the best we’ve had.

Not because we had an itinerary to High heavens,

Not because we didn’t face challenges

Not because we didn’t worry about whether the kids were happy

Not because we were rolling in money because we were actually basic

But because we still made the most it regardless.

The kids were happy just being and doing whatever we wanted.

It’s not been easy but I don’t care, I love being home and just being.

I had time to yet again take a hard look at myself and what I am here for/and I didn’t find the answer fully, but I realised whatever it is was, was a made up story.

I am here to live - that’s it and moment to moment not mater how crap it is also spectacular, it’s life - it’s all valid and momentous.

I literally have no guarantee in anything! Nothing!

But I’ve spent my whole life trying to find it and I can’t! So whilst I indulge in what can be guaranteed i.e. repeats of motherland and Gavin and Stacey. I also face the discomfort of getting on with the rest of life with no promise.

This has been the biggest hurdle of the ADHD journey but I am willing to face every panic attack going to show myself that I am absolutely safe being who I am with what I have right now.

I know I will back track and regress, I know I will fall on my knees and howl to the moon praying for better days, I know I will dysregulate and make mistakes.

But I’m no longer willing to find a solution to avoid all of this , I’d rather get to the root of what’s causing it and go from there, than spend anymore time in avoidance of real feelings and pain.

And guess what it feels frightening but also bloody Great!

I love my job and family and I can’t wait to get back to work tomorrow xxx

Oh and I’d definitely recommend watching this it’s bloody ace!

Em x